Carolina was pregnant, right at the stage
Where cravings and sickness occupy ev’ry morning
She wasn’t quite showing. There was plenty of warning
Upcoming the day when she’d turn the next page
The doctor didn’t know the sex of the baby
Too soon to be painting the walls pink or blue
Closing her eyes she is thinking that maybe
She’d better get naming her sweet babaloo
She searched everywhere locating the options
For picking out dumb baby names
Rockford and Breen and a boy named Marine
Couldn’t she find something better to do?
Than playing the game with a dumb baby name?
Fast forward two decades, the kid is all grown
And he’s starting to step out a bit on his own
In his hands are some papers with a story well known
He’s got a big date and he stands all alone
The judge declares, “There are things that are given”
“And taken for granted by everyone here”
“You think you can change up the life you are liv’n”
“If you really believe it then it just might come true”
“So I think the path leading from here is quite clear”
He announced his decision, “I approve the petition”
“Of this man who is seeking to change his first name”
“I do not oppose the new moniker chosen”
“The one he was given I think was a shame”
“Henceforth he shall no longer be referred to as ‘Eighteen’”
“Mr. Wheeler may forever now call himself ‘James’”
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