The Crappiest Weather

(To the tune of “Paper Moon”)

So you’re watching a pay-per-view
Lying lazily in your bed

(To the tune of “Monday, Monday”)

Na na, na na na na
Na na, na na na na

(To the tune of “Take Me Home, Country Roads”)

Early morning
In the bedroom

(To the tune of “Yellow Rose of Texas”)

When students on the campus go
Walk near the A-L-S

(To the tune of “Dixie”)

I am mixing up a pile of rotten
That’s how compost is begotten

(To the tune of “Red River Valley”)

In Corvallis a lovable mascot
Wonders why he’s the way that he is

(To the tune of “Battle Hymn of the Republic”)

The wisdom we have brought today’s a song that is our first
Please forgive us if it’s rough because it’s really unrehearsed

(To the tune of “Mother Nature’s Son”)

Due to all the greenhouse gas – warming’s on the rise
All day long CO2 is heating things too much up in the skies

(To the tune of “Stairway to Heaven”)

There’s a hole on the course. It is one of the worst
You’ll encounter at fairway eleven

The time’s arrived for all of us
To say a fond goodbye
We’ve truly loved the time we’ve spent
With our colleague Dr. Frei

(To the tune of “She’s Leaving Home”)

Friday evening at eight o’clock
when the shuttle stops